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Lillian Eve Moore



 







I did my first dry fast a few days ago, no food or water for 36 hours …

I am generally on, what I like to call “the pleasure diet”. I eat whatever is pleasurable to me. That means it feels good physically, emotionally, spiritually and it means that If I crave something I eat it. Typically, this diet is perfect for me.

If I am outside a lot, singing, meditating and present with my kiddos, my cravings are like a finely tuned detector, guiding me to exactly what my body needs. I eat a wide variety of plants, some cooked, some raw and the occasional consciously cared for animal.

This way of eating is pretty much how I do everything else. Its how I plan my schedule, how I spend my money, how I date.  And its great.

Accept that sometimes I am out of balance and I crave a donut and there is something about eating a donut that makes me want to eat some bacon, and brownies, and pasta and cheese. Now apply this to my whole life…

My entire guidance system off oriented towards empty calories, empty purchases, empty sex, and I wake up and can’t figure out why I feel so lousy.

Following pleasure is like following breadcrumbs. Each step might feel rewarding until you look up and realize you are way way of course.

Enter the fast. Out of absolutely nothing, what then? I find that my mind and body and spirit begin to clarify into such a precious state my standards are immediately raised. My desires recalibrate and I know what will be more deeply fulfilling and satisfying.

This is the fast I just did:

The feeling is similar to free diving, where you hold your breath for long minutes while you dive deep. The thrill and joy of being down there is only passed by the thrill and joy of breathing again. After diving, everything seems brighter and sweeter. Like cutting off all the dependancies to the outside world and diving deep, allows you to immerse more capable of connecting.

Lots of Love and happy fasting!

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I always want to speak to you. Truthfully, I dream about you. I dream about offering you gold from the fingertips to the computer. I dream about gold dripping out of my mouth as we sit together and talk about whatever you want to talk about, and it would cover our floor with preciousness.

But very often, I can’t find the floor.

Groundless, I tune in and ask, what do I know, that is useful? What could I offer as council and in answer, I get the sweetest smile from my own heart. That’s it.

Recently, I sent out a survey asking what kind of support you were needing. Most of you said I don’t know.  I don’t know either.

I am here with you in a house with children and bills. I stress about things and fight. My love life this year could have been a comedy if the leading lady hadn’t cried so much.

I sit, I sing, I write and process and my life progresses. I feel the presence of God in my life, in my being, sometimes a lot. Sometimes I feel peace. Sometimes I feel bliss in my body. Sometimes I feel connected to everything, ready to serve. Often it feels like heaven on earth and I look at my children and surrender my whole heart to joy.

With the bills and God and stress and bliss and gratitude and losing my temper and still miraculously, we are dancing in the kitchen together. We snuggle up in our sleep. I wish I had learned something.

I know nothing but that there is a sweetness in my heart that makes my own life worth living, to me. That sweetness in my heart has me seek you out for the sweetness in you.

I have positioned myself as a teacher and a leader but truthfully, I just want to be together as sweethearts.

As sweethearts, lets talk about love and debt and projects and all the things that matter the most to you and to me.

Thank you for being here with me.

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We can talk about worthiness, but to do so, we first have to pretend that you are separate. You are not. The whole of the universe moves through you.

Are you worthy of existence? Yes.

You are the source of existence. Are you worthy of being the source of existence? Yes.

The more important question is: are you enjoying yourself? This is your best indication of whether or not you are experiencing who you are.

Being who you are is the most natural thing. You will find yourself doing it any time you are not actively resisting. If you are actively resisting, all you have to do is think thoughts that are in line with who you are. These thoughts will feel true to you and they will be enjoyable to think. The rest of this recording will serve as a starting point for these kinds of thoughts.

Can you remember who you were when you were born? Can you picture a tiny, brand new baby in all their sweet perfection and know that sweet perfection was you?

You were born radiating the divine love light of creation.

You are the product of life being so in love with itself that it makes love, pollinates, goes to seed, births babies.

You might be believing that something has gone wrong in you, that life has damaged you, that the less than ideal circumstances of your childhood has damaged you. Maybe your parents weren’t fully, consciously participating in the love-making of life. Maybe childhood was mostly a lesson in what doesn’t feel good. You might think that all of this has broken you.

It hasn’t. The life force that is love, that is joy, that is desire for more still exists. It is still the foundation of all creation no matter what your experience of life has been so far. The earth is still moving around the sun, seeds are still sending sprouts out of the soil and into the air generating more and more life all the time. Wounds are healing, and as things die and rot, more and more life sprouts out of it.

All of this is who you are. The life force that is so in love with itself is so in love with you because you are life force. You are an extension of divinity reaching to extend more for the pure pleasure of existing and growing.

You are inherently good.

You are love. You are made of love. You are generating life. You are creating and moving the sweet life experience into deeper and further reaches through your personal experience. You are perfectly designed and you are doing so well. It is a delight to be alive with you!

Anything else you can know about yourself is purely for the purpose of diversifying your experience. You are exploring different states of being; you are creating yourself, which is your nature because you, too, are in love with yourself and in a constant state of expansion.

Lovingly

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The subway wishing well series:

This is a journal entry I wrote during one of the most difficult times of my life. I have been sharing recently about my growth and changes, in relationship to wealth. These articles were written when I was the poorest, in every way, that I have ever been. They are equal parts escape and venting. I didn’t publish them in my coaching blog because I was ashamed of how cynical and unproductive they were. Now I know the story has a happy ending and I want you to know if you feel like cynical now there is hope. These were written in 2010.

This particular article follows my process of releasing my childhood perceptions of money. I went through this process using tapping to move the emotions energetically.

It is so rare that we get to see the underpinnings of other families money dynamics I hope it provides insight and movement for you.

A Wealth Practice:

I am sick and tired of not knowing if I can pay the bills. I am sick and tired of being confused about the pursuit of wealth. I am sick and tired of feeling like the rugs being pulled out from me I am sick and tired of guessing. I feel stressed and confused and like I have so many unhealthy habitual ways when it comes to money.

From my Family

It seems like it was always up to luck. We were in crisis. We were rich then we weren’t. Making money was easy. Managing money was hard. Money was not to be valued. Being able to stand on your own two feet, mandatory. I bought my school clothes, and toothpaste with babysitting money starting at 11 and paid my rent throughout college when the rest of my sisters were covered.

From other family members I was taught entitlement. I was taught to be a princess. Expect the bill to be covered.

Its no wonder my finances are so messed up.

Transforming

I forgive my parents for not being financially stable. I forgive myself for feeling like I was unstable. I forgive my family for “buying my love”. I forgive myself for feeling guilty, desperate and greedy. I forgive myself and my parents for being irresponsible with money.

Insights

I don’t actually know what went on in my parents financial lives when I was a kid. I do know that I had vacations, horses, and 500 acres to roam. I bought my own clothes but I also went to one of the most expensive schools in the city. I paid my own rent but they bought me plane tickets and loaned me money for my business. Since I was little I have had to be very independent and I have also had incredible opportunities.

I have been given the perfect mixture of high expectations and work ethic.

Epilogue

My parents cosigned on $14,000 worth of loans for my education. I have opted to focus on investing more in my education and business in the last 5 years but have still paid it down to $3,848. Today my dad paid it off telling me I could pay him instead. It was incredibly generous and I am feeling really grateful.

Love

 

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Step 1. Give things away for free.

You create the culture around you through your values and behavior. By giving things away, you make it a normal way of relating. When you give for the joy of giving it shows other people how good it feels and pretty soon your whole community is reveling in giving things away!

We had two men from an ashram in Colorado staying with us. I consider it my sacred duty to feed people in my home so they were sharing breakfast, lunch and dinner with us every day for almost 2 weeks. This was a time when money was tight and the addition meant I was feeding 4 grown men and 2 boys (that eat like grown men) on my one income.
My husband was taking care of the kids, the visitors were traveling without any money and Srajan was still a full time student working part time for $8/ hr.
I decided that it was an honor to feed them and I wasn’t willing to consider any other options. The Sunday they left 2 friends (who had no idea about my predicament) dropped off 5 overflowing bags of vegatables from the farmers market. This was a total surprise!

2. Focus on other people’s needs.

When you are thinking about what other people need they feel safe to think about what you need.

My friend has two roommates. One of them always asks my friend if he needs anything when he goes to the store, does chores around the house without making a big deal and just generally is willing to help out. The other always wants exact change, lets everyone know what he has done, and always seems to be thinking about what is he going to get out of it. So the first roommate has freerange over my friends food and gadgets while the other one has to make a deal for everything.
We made veggie juice for our landlord almost every day during his first round of chemo. We cook him dinner and we plant trees in the yard. Our rent is about half market value. It is so low that decided to raise it ourselves.

3. Have faith in people.

Frequently, people aren’t as generous as they want to be because they are afraid other people will screw them over. The world is full of generous people walking around being stingy because they are afraid that other people are stingy. Pretty rediculous.

I was hitchhiking in Australia and every time I got a ride from an incredibly kind and helpful person they told me how dangerous it was to be hitchhiking. It was a little difficult to believe that there were so many kooks out there and I just happened to only meet generous, loving poeple. That is also all I met hitchhiking in New Zealand, Thailand, Hawaii, Mexico and all over the states.

4. Think outside of tit for tat.

Give where you are inspired to give. Give where you are needed and asked for. Give any time it feels good to give. That person or situation might not ever give back but it doesn’t mean you won’t be taken care of .

The day I started offering one of my premium products for donation I received $700 in unexpected payments totally unrelated to my program.

http://reconnectwithwealth.com

5. Understand where things come from.

Absolutely everything comes from the divine, through nature and through people. When you understand this you can stop trying to extract your needs from specific places. What you need will come to you if you are participating in the constant exchange of goodness.

I went for a hike in the preserve near my house. I wasn’t planning on being out that long but grabbed my pack with a water bottle, a blanket, a lighter, my fishing line. On the path I found a dead lizard that I picked up to use as bait later on. It was hot and I went through my water really quickly. About 7 miles in, and close to dark I found a spring coming out of the cliff. I filled up my water bottle through my line in the water. I caught a little cat fish, cooked it on a rock and slept happy on my blanket under the stars.

6. Be resourceful

Often the things we are looking for are already in our space. Repurposing is not only a profound way of showing respect for what you have (a critical component of having), it is also a way to show respect for the person, nature and divine that brought it to you.

My husband is king of this principle. I find that what was a broken mirror is now a disco ball bicycle helmet, old shipping pallets have become our boys bunk bed, grain from our local brewary becomes food for the chickens, and kombucha bottles become a chandelier.

7. Delight in desire

Most of us find the sensation of sexual arousal pleasurable. Desire itself is meant to be a joyful part of expanding into more. Why do we experience material want as such a stressful thing? Odds are the list of your desires is endless so if you bet your happiness on getting everytihng you want you are never going to be happy.

Finding joy in the present moment is not only the only option for happiness, it is also a great way to call things to you. Your happiness is an offering that inspires life to give you more goodness.
My luggage broke and it was ugly to begin with. I was taking frequent weekend trips and bummed out everytime I had to pack that wretched bag. Then as I was reading Mama Gena’s School of womanly arts, I realized I was not practicing attracting abundance. So I started to imagine my beautiful new bag. I could feel what it would feel like to pack it and not 24 hours later my mom gave me a brand new beautifully embroidered bag.

8. Be gracious.

Being gracious means first and foremost seeing and acknowledging what you have been given. Acknowledging that it is a gift, that regardless of your actions or who you are, you did not earn it. If thats how it worked, there would be no hardworking hungry people on the planet.

It means being grateful and communicating that gratitude in as many ways as you can relish in.

It means being grateful for the people around you, having what they want.

It means having integrity with the way you use the gift, the way you talk about it and the giver.

The list of things that have been given to me is pretty humbling. I have been given cars, dinning room sets, plane tickets, meals, rides, designer clothes, natural skin care, lots of money, classes, concerts, songs, massage/ acuppuncture/ healing/ therapy sessions, and this is just the abreviated list of things that typically cost money. I have been given so so so much more.

It is my task to be willing to receive and focus my heart on giving.

If you would like more support cultivating wealth, go here:  http://reconnectwithwealth.com

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 There is a major problem with how we think about wealth and it is keeping us from really getting our needs and desires fulfilled. 

We think about wealth as money. In actuality, is a representer of wealth. Real wealth is access to what you need and want. Food, shelter, entertainment, beauty, leisure, emotional and physical connection, creative expression, education, community, are all things that we need and want. Money doesn’t actually fulfill any needs or desires.

When we pursue money as our source of wealth we lose touch with what actually fulfils us.  The blind and unconscious pursuit of money actually takes us further away from our true happiness because we are putting our energy into something that is empty.

 

But I am not here to hate on money! Clearly money is very important…

Money REPRESENTS real wealth. It is a very powerful tool if you understand that. If you don’t understand that, you don’t know the value of money. You won’t use it wisely, you will have a hard time attracting it and when you do, you won’t be satisfied.

 

When someone pays you can see it in two different ways.

1. They have given you a piece of paper that is becoming less and less valuable the longer you hold it. You need lots of these pieces of paper to survive.

2. They have given you their attention, their time, their talents and their relationships. You need attention, time, talent, and relationships to thrive.

Not only is the 2nd perspective more empowering to you, and the payee its more accurate as well.

To understand this let’s consider the origin of money. Before bills, gold or beads were used for trading we bartered. Someone would give you time, attention, talents and relationships in exchange for the same from you.

This is the system we still use but now we pay it forward. I give my attention, time, etc to you, then you give yours to someone else, and so on. The way we represent what we have given to someone else is through money.

Here is an exercise that you can do to begin understanding the value of wealth.

 

When you do this exercise you:

- Improve your business relationships

- You feel more satisfied with the money you receive.

- You attract more wealth.

- You intantly become a more savvy spender.

 

Part 1: Every time you receive money from a client, partner, as a gift or even change for a purchase. Consider the time, attention, talents and relationships that are represented. “Thank you for this gift”

Part 2: Every time you spend, give, move or invest money consider your time, attention, talents and relationships that are represented by that money and say this mantra “Thank you for this gift”

If you would like more support finding fulfillment in your finances, check out this free video training series “Wealth and Freedom

 

 

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The subway wishing well series:

This is an article I wrote during one of the most difficult times of my life. I have been sharing recently about my growth and changes, in relationship to wealth. These articles were written when I was the poorest, in every way that I have been. They are equal parts escape and venting. I didn’t publish them in my coaching blog because I was ashamed of how cynical and unproductive they were. Now I know the story has a happy ending and I want you to know if you feel like cynical now there is hope. These were written in 2010.

There are so many ways to live.

As a child I lived on limitless land. Hopping fences and stealing horses, pretending I was exploring uncharted territories while avoiding being seen by the houses scattered through the Texas hill country. My room was a fairy tale. I lived with my feet trudging through the mud of the Gulf of Mexico and violently attacked by the west Texas cactus and bramble.

I have lived with friends in houses with potlucks and parties. I lived with other families learning how they love eachother and drive eachother nuts. I have been adopted into new families, collecting tribes and communities as I go.

I have lived alone in tiny apartments. I have lived alone in a beautiful house over looking the pacific ocean and waipio valley. I would dream every night of loved ones visiting me there and wake up to being alone again. I have lived out of my backpack sleeping in hammocks in Mexico, bungalows in Thailand, under tarps in Europe, in caves in Hawaii. I have lived out of my car.

Throughout high school I would leave for school Friday morning and not come home until Sunday night exhausted from playing, making love, and falling deeper in love with my friends. I have lived with lovers, in the ocean, in homes, with parents, on couches.

Now I live in an apartment on the south east corner of prospect park in Brooklyn. There are people living piled on top of me and piled under me. I hear the sounds of their children’s feet and their fights. I paint trees on the walls and plant things in soil in tiny cups hoping that they will grow in this hostile environment. This whole city feels like a slum, segregating the humans from the rest of the natural world isolating the damage to one pile of refuse. It seems like a good idea for the planet minimizing the damage but a really bad idea for the humans. I think there are better ways to live.

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I want to start off by saying, this was crushing. I cried, re-evaluated, shamed myself, blamed them, felt like a fraud, and went over everything I should have done and everything I would never do again.  I offer more in this program than any other. The participants get sessions with me whenever they want and they get trained by some of my teachers. I feel this incredible commitment to these people and I love them. It is also very intensive opportunity to uproot your demons and play the role of miracle worker in others lives. My initial reaction was ego hurt, “they don’t like me”. Then I understood… but I will come back to that.

There are lessons for me and lessons for you as well.

I know that many of you are embarking (or dreaming about embarking) on a new path. You are starting a business or changing careers or getting involved in something or just trying to live more consciounsously. If this had happened to me when I first started out I probably would have quit then and there. I and so many people would have missed out.

There are lessons for me and lessons for you as well.

1. You never know what you’re doing.

I mean this on multiple levels. Expertise means continuing to grow and evolve. There will never be a point where I hear a complaint from a client or my husband or a friend and say, “no, I know what I am talking about, you’re wrong”. Not even after 50 years and accolades and bestselling books.

And you don’t get to know the outcome of your actions. I send a heart felt email reaching out to my client offering help from what I guessed she was struggling with and she responded with don’t ever talk to me again. Does that mean I shouldn’t have sent the email? Of course not.

Don’t wait until you “KNOW” what you are doing. Just be capable of doing it well and with love.

2. Being well informed, being honest, being humble and always coming from Love, is the antidote.

While you may never know what you are doing it is your responsibility to always be striving for mastery. This is not just for everyone else involved it is for your own fulfillment. Your integrity does not hinge upon you forcing specific outcomes, but by bringing forth your absolute best and offering it as a loving gift.

Humility is not lowering yourself but having a vulnerable heart that will listen to the impact of you your actions. This is how our intuition evolves, we feel and we gather information and we feel more. When we do this with mindfulness i.e. from a spiritual center we fine tune our intuition.

3. People will make up shit in their head

1 month into working with one of my clients she was crying, saying I was an angel and an answer to her prayers. The next month she said I was a fraud and the other participants were drinking my cool aide. I am not either of those things.

The biggest mistake that I know I made in this program is giving people too much time alone to dig in their stuff. When we are left alone in our heads without a solid spiritual ground to stand on our stories get out of control.

It is important to see this in others so that we don’t take it personally. As soon as we take it personally we are no longer coming from love but protecting ourselves.

It is also important to see this in ourselves when we feel at our most upset it is almost always because of a story we have made up in our heads about what happened.

Want to know more about that? Click here:

4. Don’t sulk

I would really like to sulk. I would really, really like to bury my head in shame for a couple of months but I have 75,000 people on my email list who are expecting me to respond to their questions and post blogs. I have 10 other clients to take care of, I’m developing a new program, not to mention twin boys and a garden.

When something goes wrong, someone talks smack, or lets you down, or drops out of your program, it may pull focus for a few minutes, it may feel like the main event of your life but let’s get real. You and I are so incredibly blessed.

5. Take responsibility for everything.

Now this is not the same as taking blame for everything. Taking responsibility is looking at yourself as a creative force in your life. This is empowering rather than shaming. It sets you up to look at any circumstance as an opportunity to grow and treat everyone else with compassion.

In my situation, I could act like a victim and say that some people just have too many issues and they broke their commitment to the group and to me. I could say it was all of their fault.

I could also feel ashamed of myself and think that I shouldn’t be doing what I am doing. I failed and its no wonder they hate me so much.

Neither of these is accurate or helpful. Instead, I know that I attracted these clients, I can see where I could have done more in the interview process. I can see that accepting these clients meant that I would need to give them special attention, which I did not give. I can also see that I need to be clearer about the intensity of the program and the level of commitment necessary.

Want to read more about taking responsibility for everything? Click here

To be honest I am still dealing with this. I have never experienced anything like it, my clients love me and even when they don’t they stay with it long enough to get the value and part with gratitude and respect. So I will do what I do when I am dealing with things. I will meditate, spend time outside, practice EFT, talk to my mentor, pray, brainstorm and move with evermore love, intentionality and integrity.

Love

 

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Its 2 and I am just sitting down to work. Quality time with my kids 6-8:45, Yoga 9-10, weekly date with best friend 10:30-1, zoned out in front of my computer 1-2. Damn. 

I want to do what I FEEL like doing in any given moment. I am healthy in mind/body/spirit and I trust that what I feel like doing is the right thing to do. I also trust that when I feel like doing it, it will be done the right way.

Then there is commitment, what I said I would do, what needs to get done. There are the things that I don’t feel like doing that further what I REALLY feel like doing.

This isn’t just an issue with myself but also in my relationship with the Universe. I’d like to follow ease and calling and go with the flow. I also don’t want to give in just because there is an obstacle.

How can I get shit done and be in the natural flow of it? Most might say to just suck it up and push through the deep need to take a nap instead of write the blog or keep my meeting even when my computer crashes and their is terrible traffic and its a gorgeous day outside.

I am developing a different strategy. 

I am noticing that these things aren’t random. My mood isn’t random and the Universe throwing a hickup in my day isn’t random. There is a divine design and going with the flow doesn’t mean being blindly blown about.

Here is my guide to flow, integrity and just doing what you want:

1. Get to know your energy flow. How do you feel when you wake up, after a meal, on a rainy day. When do you have the best of yourself to offer and what do you want to give that to? When are you just going to be low energy? Can you allow for a rest?

I am my best about half an hour after I wake up. That is the time that I give to my kids. I have pretty much nothing in the mid afternoon. That is when I go sit in the woods.

2. Get to know what affects your energy. How do your different activities interact with each other?

I get another 2 hours of quality work time after I do yoga. After a big meal if I sit at the computer I will lose 2 hours without looking up. A great business meeting gets me all energized, I can’t write but I am great for exercise or playing with kids or doing house stuff.

3. Create a morning and bedtime routine. The morning and evening are both time when you get to set the tone for the rest of your life. If you can enforce some hardline non-negotiables then, whatever comes in between, you will feel centered.

This is what really gets me. When I do it I have incredible days, when I don’t I have days like today.

4. Check the weather. Seriously, this is a big deal. This is a very simple practical thing and it is a big indicator of what your energy is going to be geared for. Rainy days are great for internal work, and intimate gatherings, not so much for running errands or company picnics.

5. Ask for the easy way. When other people are involved, work together to create ease around any plan or goal. Don’t just think of when you can do it, think of when it will be easy to do it. Don’t just think of the location that works, think of the location that you will want to be at.

6. Balance over time. If you try and keep work, spiritual life, family life, social life in balance all the time, you will fail and you will end up sacrificing things you shouldn’t sacrifice. Instead, cultivate a balance over time. If you have to dive into a work project for a few weeks and you don’t see your friends or family just make sure you plan some extra social time at the end of it.

 

I would love to hear your tricks for working with the Universe to only do what you want. Leave a comment below.

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Most of us, at some point in our childhood, shut down. Either because we were taught by painful experiences or by the presence of the shut down grown ups around us.

In some sense, it’s like we left our bodies and our minds to run on autopilot or to run the same way the people around us were running.

 

Coming back to your mind and body can be painful at first. Its like exercising for the first time in a long time. You might be stiff and easily injured. If you come back to your mind, you might find that the thoughts are harsh and ugly. You might find that your emotions are painful and fearful.

 

If, however, you are willing to be with that initial discomfort you get an incredible reward. Suddenly, you have a whole body and a whole mind to use and live inside of. You have an infinitely miraculous resource that is yours to create with.

 

This is also true in our connection to other people and even to our planet. When we learned to shut down, we didn’t just close ourselves of to our mind and body. We closed off to everything.

 

This shutting down makes us feel like we are isolated. It makes us feel as though our lives are meaningless. It makes us feel exhausted and lost.

 

Coming back to earth and its people at first can feel like an insurmountable challenge. Attempting to develop real relationships may feel incredibly complicated and a bit like a minefield. Not to mention facing the larger social structures of poverty, class, race, culture and all of the injustices. Our relationship to the planet often fills us with guilt and confusion. We don’t know how to face what we have done to this beautiful gift or how to do better.

 

If, however, you are willing to be with that initial discomfort you get another incredible reward. Suddenly, you have a whole planet and a world full of people to live and work with. You have an infinitely miraculous resource that is yours to serve.

Your body and mind and planet and people are your birthright. They are yours to create with and to serve. I want you to start living with that truth!

 

April 4th – 6th I am holding a workshop in Austin TX that will change your life. You can register and get all the details below.

 

http://www.lillianevemoore.com/landing/the-reconnection-workshop/

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